So I'm back in Leeds and I feel like a hermit. I managed to land some much-needed writing work for over the summer and have taken on much more than I can reasonably handle without my health rapidly declining. I have 31 days worth of work to do before I go on holiday which means I have 25 days to do this in, including weekends. The average day is supposed to be comprised of re-writing 65 product reviews for a certain big-name catalogue website. As I already have weekend plans, my week days follow a rigid work schedule:
Get up around 9 to tidy my inbox
Start the first batch of 65 product rewrites
Have a break after about 20 to make a vitamin drink I hope might make me feel more alive
Continue writing at least another 20 before taking another break to eat something quickly
Finish the first batch of 65, do my daily pilates routine for 40 minutes and have a shower
Start the next batch of 65 rewrites
Have a quick break after around 20 rewrites where I might treat myself to unloading the dishwasher, doing some other over-due writing work that's a tad more creative or cleaning the Major's litter tray
Continue for another 20 rewrites before briefly stopping to eat something and making a quick phone call while preparing food
Finish the second batch of 65 rewrites in the early hours of the morning
Of course not every day is quite like this but nearly every day. I was afraid I'd be having nightmares about dresses, instead I have a permanent dull headache. Don't get me wrong – I'm really appreciative of the work and a keen dress wearer but working “double days” is exhausting.
The hardest part is writing positive reviews when I'd really love to be honest and pen an enjoyably venomous product description:
This sack-like dress from ? hangs shapelessly from the body yet somehow manages to accentuate fat tyres. Available in a range of ill-fitting sizes, for a tasteless look pair this with figure-hugging 80s leggings to get that shapely camel-toe look (http://www.celebsin
leggings.com/tag/camel-toe/). • Washable but may shrink • 100% itchy polyester • Length approx: 86 cm (34 ins) • Sizes S - XL to fit sizes 10–16
The dresses I'm writing about seem to come in waves. Last night I reached the “ho” section and again found it difficult being positive about a whole array of near identical minis:
Writing about 100s of dresses, sadly hasn't put me off buying them (much to The Boy's dismay), despite feeling all-dressed out. I can't wait for the start of the tops section... Cramming this much work into so few days, reminds me of preparing for exams - the end is in sight but in the meantime life is a monotonous haze of over-whelming somewhat repetitive tasks. Thankfully, unlike school days, the end is not a nerve-wracking exam but a week relaxing in the sun and hopefully catching up on some much needed sleep.